Kong: Skull Island (2017) Review

Kong: Skull Island (2017) Review

The original 1933 King Kong is one of my all-time favourite movies, and the 2005 remake, while certainly no classic, is one of my favourite remakes of all-time, and one of the most-memorable theater-going experiences I had as a kid. So when I heard they were rebooting the eighth wonder of the world and linking him to the new American incarnation of Godzilla for an eventual clash in 2020, I was beyond excited. However, as more footage was revealed, I tempered my expectations, and I’m glad I did, because Kong: Skull Island was, unfortunately, quite disappointing, but not necessarily a bad movie. 

Right from the opening scene I was concerned. I really disliked the opening prologue, for a number of reasons. I’ll try to remain mostly spoiler free, but if you’ve seen any of the trailers, then you’ve seen most of the big moments from the movie already, so I just won’t talk about anything that wasn’t shown in trailers. Kong is shown in the very first scene, not in his entirety, but still quite prominently. It’s a cool reveal, but having him appear this early takes away the suspense and build-up of seeing him later, so when he is shown in full later, it’s not as big of a moment as it should be. After the prologue the opening titles are shown over old stock footage in a format nearly identical to 2014’s Godzilla, except with significantly less-epic music (the score in this movie was completely forgettable). Even the opening title font was bad. Only five minutes in, and my hopes were already plummeting. 

The first act is solid. All of the characters are introduced, with John Goodman and Samuel L. Jackson at the forefront, as a scientist and colonel, respectively, but it’s the characters played by Tom Hiddleston and Brie Larson who become the main human protagonists. Act one sets up an interesting team with lots of potential—there’s a mix of scientists, explorers, and Vietnam soldiers—and as they arrived at Skull Island, I was starting to get into it. Then, as seen in the trailers, Kong shows up out of nowhere, throwing trees and smashing apart helicopters in a fit of rage. It’s a cool scene, albeit with way too much slow motion (but the slow-mo overkill only just begins here). In the aftermath of Kong’s destruction, the group is split up into different factions on different parts of the island, and from here, the movie starts to fall apart. 

Act two feels like scene after scene of cool stuff happening, and that’s it. There’s no clear direction or theme or flow. Characters move from one part of the island, encounter some kind of generic monster, maybe some of them die, and then they move on. Kong pops in here and there, but for the first time in any King Kong movie, the titular giant monster has nothing to do. Seriously, Kong is just, there. In the original, he grabbed Anne Darrow, protected her from dinosaurs, and the team pursued Kong to get her back. A simple and effective concept. Here, Kong has no objective and little connection to the humans. Some characters want Kong dead, some want to help him, and everyone wants to escape the island. This movie should have been called Skull Island, with Kong as the subtitle, or just Skull Island, as originally planned. People complained that 2014’s Godzilla wasn’t in his own movie enough, but at least he had a clear reason for being there. 

This brings me to another major issue I had with Kong: Skull Island. If this movie is supposed to take place in the same universe as Godzilla, why make it so utterly dumb? I’m not saying that just because Godzilla and Kong are in the same universe that their movies should have the same tone and style. But if you compare Godzilla and Kong: Skull Island, they are vastly different in terms of believability and lore. Godzilla took the outlandish concept of a giant, ancient monster and crafted an acceptable back story for Big G, while also making it feel real, like he was some kind of natural disaster. But, director Gareth Edwards was also aiming to make Godzilla serious and as grounded as possible.

I can tell what director Jordan Vogt-Roberts was trying to do with Kong: Skull Island. He tried to make a fun throwback to the monster movies of old, and for the most part, I’ll admit it was fun and did feel like a throwback. It wasn’t trying to be an epic beauty-and-beast adventure like the original, it’s a straight-up action movie. However, I found the retooling of the Kong mythos significantly sub-par, not just in comparison to Godzilla but just in general, and in the end, this movie only really serves to reintroduce a bigger, badder Kong who can later take on Godzilla. The movie itself is pretty much inconsequential. 

Getting into the Kong mythos, I found some of the choices odd when it came to referencing previous Kong movies and redesigning Skull Island itself (Side note: there’s a very specific reference to Jurassic Park that’s one of my two favourite lines in the whole movie). With Peter Jackson’s King Kong, it was a very different situation, because he was straight-up remaking the original movie, but in doing so paid lots of tribute to it. Kong: Skull Island isn’t a retelling, it’s a brand-new tale, which Kong just happens to be a part of, so I was open to any new directions they took with the story and human characters.

Unfortunately, they left out the best part of any Kong movie next to Kong himself: the dinosaurs. The 1976 remake of King Kong did the same thing, and that was part of the reason that movie was so unsatisfying. There are other creatures on this new version of Skull Island, but none of them are remarkable. A giant spider, a giant octopus (which I believe was a reference to a scene in the original King Kong vs. Godzilla), and the never-before-seen species called skull crawlers, which resembles the two-legged lizard creature that crawls out of the chasm in the ‘33 King Kong. The skull crawlers just didn’t do it for me. They felt generic and unworthy as opponents for the humans or Kong. I think the reason generic monsters replaced dinosaurs is likely to connect it more to Godzilla, and yet other traditional Kong elements are still included, like the natives, the perpetual storm that surrounds the island, and huge wall to keep creatures out (all of which are made dumber in varying ways). 

As for Kong himself, this was one of the highlights of the movie for me. He isn’t as sympathetic as in past incarnations, but he still expresses emotion, and looks less like an ape and more like the ‘33 original, a real movie monster. He’s huge, tough, kicks a lot of ass, and the cgi is terrific (though still not quite as good as Peter Jackson’s cgi Kong). But, as I said, Kong doesn’t have a lot to do, and he’s absent for a large portion of the movie. I like what they did with recreating the Kong character, I’m glad he’s back, and I’m looking forward to seeing him return, but his role in this movie was poor, and looking at Kong: Skull Island as a whole movie, it’s unexceptional.

As I was sitting there, slightly bored leading up to the finale (which sort of picked up but still never had me anywhere close to fist-pumping), I wondered why Kong: Skull Island was so disappointing, especially in comparison to Godzilla, which I thoroughly enjoyed. Somehow, a Godzilla movie can get away with being just the same thing every time, but King Kong is held in higher regard. Godzilla had pretty bland human characters, and so does Kong: Skull Island. The difference here is, the Skull Island cast is really good. Like, too good. I saw the actors instead of the characters most of the time, and it was distracting. I haven’t talked much about the characters because there isn’t much to talk about. All I know about Tom Hiddleston’s character is he’s a tracker and doesn’t care about people being killed and can suddenly use a sword to fight monsters when the time comes. Brie Larson is a photographer who gapes at everything at every turn and does little else. Samuel L. Jackson wants Kong dead. John C. Reilly is there to be funny. That’s about it. I don’t need incredibly deep human characters in these kinds of movies, but at least give me more than crappy dialogue and boring people stumbling into cool action scenes. 

In the end, Kong: Skull Island had moments of greatness that didn’t amount to a whole lot. I can’t even get upset about it because it’s nothing more than just another monster movie. 2014’s Godzilla was a B movie trying to be an A movie, and ended up being a B+ at best. Kong: Skull Island is a B movie, trying to be a B movie, but ends up being maybe a C+, and that’s being generous. If you’re a fan of King Kong or monster movies in general, then of course go and see it, but otherwise (and I hate to say this), just skip it, and wait for Godzilla vs. Kong in 2020. Final note: there’s an end-credit teaser that’s perhaps the best thing from the entire movie.   

Santa Clarita Diet Season One Review

Santa Clarita Diet Season One Review 

Santa Clarita Diet is a new Netflix series that premiered last week, starring Drew Barrymore and Timothy Olyphant as the Hammonds, a successful real estate couple with a normal Santa Clarita life, until one day, Drew Barrymore’s character Sheila gets sick and, well, kind of dies. But, she’s not dead, she’s undead, and now she needs to eat human flesh, which her husband Joel (Olyphant) so graciously helps her obtain. Okay, yes, they become murderers, but they only kill bad people! They are still good people! At least, that’s the façade they try to maintain (to varying levels of success).

Let me start by talking about the actors. Timothy Olyphant practically steals the show. I’ve always enjoyed his work, but I didn’t expect him to give such an awesome performance here. He delivers his lines with such sincerity (even his most-absurd lines, and there are a number of them) and is genuinely hilarious. I haven’t seen Drew Barrymore in anything for quite a while, so it was nice to see her in something current (I’ve been a fan for some time now), but to be honest, she isn’t terrific. Her joke delivery is hit-and-miss—in the pilot episode especially, she has more misses than hits. But, her comedic timing becomes better toward the end of the season. And she looks great, even as she consumes raw, bleeding flesh. 

The two leads are pretty consistent and have good chemistry, but the supporting cast is a bit of a different story. In the trailer I saw for the series, Nathan Fillion makes an appearance, and his presence is one of the things that drew me to watch it, which I’m sure is true for many other people. Without spoiling too much, I’ll say he’s great in the pilot, but his role is far too short-lived, which I found pretty disappointing.

The unsung hero of the show, someone I didn’t expect to like at first, was the Hammond’s teen neighbour Eric (Skyler Gisondo). He might not end up being everyone’s fave, but he made me laugh out loud at least once in every episode. Sheila and Joel’s daughter, Abby (Liv Hewson), seemed like she might be annoying at first, but she ended up being another one of the funniest supporting characters, despite frequently having little to do except be shocked by her parents antics and hang out with Eric just to make for comedic moments. There are some entertaining side characters, like Eric’s mom (Mary Elizabeth Ellis) and Dr. Wolf (Portia de Rossi) who comes in at the end, and some annoying side characters, but no one particularly annoying sticks around for too long.

I didn’t know what to make of this show when I began watching it. The first episode gets things off to a rocky start. A lot of “shock” jokes are thrown in seemingly at random—by “shock” jokes, I don’t even mean jokes, necessarily, just random shocking comments meant to come off as funny because “OMG can’t believe he/she just said that!” but it doesn’t work. One example is when Eric and his mom are introduced. She tells Abby that Eric really likes her, and mentions she’s at the top of his spank bank. Of course Eric is embarrassed. That’s it. That’s the “joke”. It’s not that funny, and there are a lot of moments like that in episode one and two, which made it hard to determine what tone the show was going for. There are parts that are weird, and parts that are just plain dumb. 

Then there are the parts with shocking violence and gore, as well. This didn’t bother me, but it will definitely be a point of contention for some viewers. Horror-comedy is difficult to do well, but I wouldn’t call this horror-comedy, per se. It’s not trying to be scary, it’s more about, once again, the shock factor. Sheila and Joel kill people, and it’s bloody, and brutal, but played up in a light-hearted way. And it works pretty well most of the time. The effects look good and are mostly practical. There are moments where Drew Barrymore bites into body parts that look totally real. 

Santa Clarita starts out as a sort-of-realistic world, with some obvious wackiness to the characters, and the mysterious illness that befalls Sheila is recognized as being akin to a zombie, but as its further explored, it becomes clear that this is a slightly more original take on the undead. As the series progresses, it starts to find its footing, and goes less for shock humour and more for just genuine jokes and laughs. However, part of the initial appeal of the show, for me, was how unpredictable it was in the first few episodes. I’m not saying it was like early Game of Thrones level of unpredictability, it was just enough to keep me wanting to see more. By around episode five, it started to feel like they were running out of ideas, and things started becoming more predictable, but also funnier, so it was a bit of a trade-off.  

Ultimately, this show is, on multiple levels, difficult to recommend. I don’t think it has any kind of mass appeal, it’s going to cater to a niche audience. If you like gory, bloody TV shows/movies, stick with me. If you like gory, bloody shows that are serious, then this isn’t for you. If you like horror-comedy, such as Ash vs. Evil Dead (which this series seriously pales in comparison to), this won’t satisfy in those regards, because it lacks the horror aspect. If you like irreverent humour AND gory stuff, then you might like it.

Santa Clarita Diet season one consists of ten, half-hour episodes, so it’s very easy to watch the whole series really quickly. I’d give it a soft recommendation, if you like intermittent scenes of gore, zany characters, and general weirdness. I didn’t love this first season. It’s not really a spoiler to say things end unresolved and it feels like there should be another episode to watch next. But, I didn’t really feel like I needed to see more right away. In fact, I’m not sure I need to watch more at all, or even go back and re-watch season one anytime soon. That doesn’t mean I didn’t like it, I laughed quite a lot at many points. It just didn’t hook me. 

Most-Anticipated Movies of 2017: C.C.C Issue #61

Most-Anticipated Movies of 2017

 

Well, 2016 went out with a whimper for me, because I was stuck at home, sick, but as the flu subsides and 2017 (which has to be better than last year, right?) slowly gets underway, it’s time for me to look at my most-anticipated movie releases!

2017 will be the year my bank account died, because there are so many movies coming out this year that I want to see—I couldn’t even narrow it down to ten, so here’s my top 16.

16. Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

From the director of The Fifth Element, which was a crazy sci-fi adventure, this looks like it could be yet another one of those, but with some extremely impressive cgi effects. It could be one of those movies worth shelling out a little extra for 3D, but hopefully the characters and story are as strong as the visuals. It’s based on a comic series, so we’ll see how it translates to the big screen. Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets flies into theaters July 21^st.

15. Kingsman: The Golden Circle

The first Kingsman was one of the biggest surprises of 2015, and I’m glad to see it get a sequel, but even gladder to see just about everyone return in front of and behind the camera. I really enjoyed Taron Edgerton in the lead role, and look forward to seeing what he does this time around. New additions to the cast, such as Elton John and Julianne Moore have me intrigued, and the supposed return of Colin Firth’s character, the biggest badass from the first movie, has me a little uncertain, but if he comes back for another church massacre scene, then I’m good with it. Kingsman: The Golden Circle drops into theaters October 6^th.

14. T2: Trainspotting

Trainspotting was an intense, unsettling, and yet funny movie all at once, exploring the lives of heroin users in Scotland, but it wrapped up pretty neatly and didn’t seem to warrant a sequel. However, it’s been over twenty years since Trainspotting, and T2 returns to all of the characters, all played by the same actors again, with director Danny Boyle returning, and the screenplay is based on the novel Porno, which itself was a sequel to the Trainspotting novel (upon which that film was based). T2 seems to have the potential to be a unique sequel and possibly be on-par with the original. T2: Trainspotting arrives in theaters March 10^th. 

13. Dunkirk

Christopher Nolan is one of the highest-profile directors working today, so if he has a new movie on the way, you can bet it’s one of the most-anticipated of the year. The first full-length trailer gave some glimpses of the intense war scenes, impressive cast, including Nolan regulars Tom Hardy and Cillian Murphy, and of course the incredible cinematography. I’m not a huge war movie fan, but I’m very interested to see Christopher Nolan’s take on World War II, and it’s nice to see him do something grounded in reality for a change of pace. Dunkirk storms into theaters July 21^st.

12. Wonder Woman

 

Going from World War II to World War I with this next installment in the floundering DC movie universe. Last year’s efforts, Batman v Superman and Suicide Squad, both fell mostly flat for me, and the upcoming Justice League really doesn’t interest me a whole lot, but if Wonder Woman can succeed, I might have hope for DC movies yet. It seems to have everything going for it: Wonder Woman herself was good in Batman v Superman, the rest of the cast is good, including the always-charismatic Chris Pine, and the trailers have looked good so far, so let’s hope this, the first major female-led superhero movie, is a solid hit. Wonder Woman charges into theaters June 2^nd.

11. Terminator 2: Judgment Day 3D

 

Here’s another T2, but not a new sequel. Back in August, it was announced Terminator 2—one of the best sequels ever, one of the best action movies ever, and one of my favourite movies ever—would be getting a theatrical re-release sometime in 2017, and converted to 3D. I’m not particularly excited about the 3D aspect, but on the bright side, it’s James Cameron we’re talking about, the guy who made the best-looking 3D movie ever (Avatar). I’m just psyched to see one of my favourite movies on the big screen in a way I’ve never seen it before. Terminator 2: Judgment Day 3D doesn’t have a scheduled release date yet, but maybe we can expect it August 29^th? (That’s a Terminator reference in case you missed it)

10. Blade Runner 2049 

I only saw Blade Runner for the first time in 2015, right around when I started hearing they were working on a sequel, and after seeing the original, I thought a sequel might be difficult, but now that I’ve seen all of director Denis Villeneuve’s films (Arrival, his latest, is my favourite of 2016), I’m certain he is the perfect person to bring Blade Runner back. Joining him is the always-reliable Ryan Gosling, but Harrison Ford is returning as well, and if he does as well as he did in Force Awakens, that’ll be a major plus. Throw in original Blade Runner screenwriter Hampton Fancher doing to script, and it sounds like Blade Runner 2049 could be yet another contender for a sequel on-par with or better than the original. It comes out October 6^th.

9. Thor: Ragnarok

 

Marvel Studios is coming out with three movies next year, which is a first, and yet they’re still all among my most-anticipated. Thor hasn’t been my favourite character in the MCU, and I’d rank his two stand-alone movies pretty low compared to other Marvel movies, but I think Thor: Ragnarok could be the best Thor movie yet, for a number of reasons. We know Thor is teaming with Hulk, and it’ll be like a buddy cop movie on alien worlds, which sounds great. Director Taika Waititi takes the helm, and his movies What We Do in the Shadows and Hunt for the Wilderpeople showed me he can handle action and humour and heart very well. I’m very excited to see what he does with Thor, and even that little mockumentary-style clip of what Thor did during Civil War was pure gold. Thor: Ragnarok explodes into theaters November 3^rd.

8. Spider-Man: Homecoming

If I had to pick a favourite superhero, I would probably pick Spider-Man. With the character now back in the care of Marvel, I can actually get excited about a new movie focused on the wall-crawler, and the first trailer looks like it’ll be a solid reboot to the character (even though he technically already got rebooted in Civil War, but that was only a small role it didn’t count! This is official!) I’m a bit iffy on Vulture as a villain, but at least they have Michael Keaton in the role, and he’s a villain we haven’t seen in a movie before. Throw in RDJ suiting up as Iron Man alongside Spidey, and this might be the most-fun Spider-Man movie yet. Spider-Man: Homecoming comes to theaters July 7^th.

7. The Dark Tower

It has been far too long since a great Stephen King novel has been made into a great film, and I hope The Dark Tower breaks that spell. Idris Elba takes on the role of Roland, a gunslinger in pursuit of The Man in Black, A.K.A Stephen King’s version of Satan, played by Matthew McConaughey, which I think is perfect casting, and it is apparently a sequel to the novels, which I don’t think has ever been done before in any other film series or adaptation, but will still stand on its own. I hope the delays this film has been plagued by are all positives, just giving the filmmakers enough time to work out the bugs and make the best movie possible. The Dark Tower journeys into theaters July 28^th.  

6. War for the Planet of the Apes

 

The rest of these movies (except #1) are ranked mostly on how I responded to the trailers—taking trailers out of the equation, they pretty much are all my number one. But squeaking in at number six is the much-awaited third film in the Planet of the Apes reboot series, which started unexpectedly strong with Rise, continued exponentially stronger with Dawn, and now looks to be continuing stronger yet, with War giving fans the ape-on-human battle we’ve been waiting for. Woody Harrelson will probably be the strongest villain we’ve seen yet, and his clash with Andy Serkis’ Caesar might close the book on Caesar’s story, but will it conclude this trilogy or continue to lead up to another remake of the first Planet of the Apes? We will see. War for the Planet of the Apes swings into theaters July 14^th.

5. Logan

This is where things start to get crazy. I didn’t think a Wolverine movie would be so high on my most-anticipated, but after hearing this will likely be Hugh Jackman’s last time playing the title character (plus Patrick Stewart’s last time playing Professor X), and learning it will be R-rated, and seeing that first trailer, it quickly went from being just that third solo Wolverine movie to a very important and unique-looking superhero film that, I think, might show us the death of one of the most-beloved heroes of the 21^st century, and make a lot of fans cry. Logan slashes into theaters March 3^rd.   

4. Kong: Skull Island

Prior to the second trailer, this was my most-anticipated movie of 2017. The first trailer showed just enough Kong, an amazing visual style, and glimpses of the impressive cast. But then, the second trailer came out, and my excitement lessened. I’m most-concerned about the tone. The second trailer was campier and showed too much of the over-the-top monster action (and too much of Kong), and John C. Reilley’s presence distracted me in the worst way. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still super-jacked to see Kong back on the big screen, and in a new story that we know won’t end with him dying, but I’m keeping a lot of my excitement in check for now. Kong: Skull Island arrives in theaters March 10^th.

3. Alien: Covenant

Here’s another movie I’m very nervous about, but unlike Kong, the trailer made me more hopeful instead of more nervous. I had doubts of ever seeing the sequel promised to us at the end of Prometheus, and while I wish we were getting something more in-line with that movie, I can’t be upset to see director Ridley Scott return to a true Alien movie, which is what Prometheus was supposed to be originally anyway. This is still a sequel to Prometheus and still a prequel to Alien, but hopefully it answers some more questions about where these creatures originated, or at least gets us closer to some answers, while delivering the first true-horror movie starring the xenomorph in far too long. Alien: Covenant invades theaters May 19^th.

2. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 

How the hell am I more excited for a movie about a talking tree and talking racoon than a new Alien movie and a new King Kong movie? I don’t know, call it Marvel magic. Marvel’s first of the year, a sequel to one of their biggest surprise hits yet, looks like it has the best chance of any sequel coming out in 2017 to be better than the original. The first Guardians was terrific, but had to do mandatory world building and character intros. With that out of the way, Vol. 2 can get into new adventures, new worlds, and even new versions of old characters, like Baby Groot, who the world is already in love with just from the first two teaser trailers. The thing I’m looking forward to the most is having some damn fun at the theaters. I am Groot. Translation: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 comes out May 5^th.

1. Star Wars – Episode VIII

My most-anticipated movie of 2015 was The Force Awakens, which totally delivered, but my most-anticipated of 2016, Rogue One, did not, so Star Wars is one-for-two under the Disney regime thus far for me. However, I don’t think I’m being unreasonable putting Episode VIII (still untitled) as my number one. Sure, J.J. Abrams is out as director, but stepping in is Rian Johnson, who aced his last movie, Looper, and will hopefully ace this sequel, which is easily the most-anticipated sequel of the year (perhaps many years). I’m hoping it follows through on the characters that were so well introduced in Force Awakens, while introducing new lovable and/or despicable characters and forging a new story, instead of rehashing old plot points. Star Wars – Episode VIII blasts into theaters December 15^th.